The Crazy Cat: Update

Last you heard from me, I was a prisoner in my own home.

I'm going to rewind to that precise moment.

So I spent the next four hours behind a locked door and attempted to distract myself by throwing my brain, which was still in flight or fight mode, into my work.

As hard as I tried to concentrate on the task at hand, my mind kept wandering off into wild fantasies, like I was J.D. in "Scrubs." I kept replaying a particularly odd scenario in my head. In this daydream, Joey was busy harnessing a booby trap that consisted of a single, lonely Reese's Peanut Butter Cup (my favorite candy) casually sitting on the ground just on the other side of my office door. I pictured myself opening the door, finding the delicious treat, and bending over to pick it up. As soon as my hand extended to pick up the chocolatey goodness, Joey, who was situated on the other end of the hallway, would yank on a fat piece of rope that would catch me around my wrist and string me up from the ceiling. Than, as I struggled to free myself, Joey would run wild through the house, creating havoc and hysteria, while leaving a trail of kitty litter in his wake. Meanwhile I would be sentenced to my own personal hell, consisting of observing Joey's demolition derby without having the ability to stop him.

Suddenly, I snapped back to reality. I shook my head back and forth to awaken me from the crazy stupor, and I tried to comfort myself by uttering the words, "It's just a cat... it's just a cat."

As I buried my head in my work, little did I realize how quickly time had passed. Suddenly I felt a grumbling in my stomach, glanced at the clock, and noticed that it was lunch time.

I decided to venture outside of the office for the first time since, what has now been called "the incident." When I opened the door, Joey was simply lying indolently just outside. He carelessly looked up at me and gave me a "sup dude" head nod.

I walked downstairs, prepared my lunch, and brought it back to my office. By this point Joey had curled up on the papasan chair near my desk and fallen asleep.

"Crisis averted," I said aloud.

Joey poked his head up from the oversized black cushion and gave me a long glance.

"For now..." I grumbled and went back to work.